May 27, 2005

Bye Bye!

This is my first, and last, post from the office. Today is my last day at the office in Amherst. Tomorrow, we're going to do a site visit at Williams College. That night, gleeful merrymaking. And the next morning?
The next chapter in the book of my life!

May 12, 2005

Uncommon Grounds

Well, it won’t be long now before I’m en route to an entirely new life and lifestyle. Its strange, because the life I’m leaving hasn’t been bad to me. In fact, its been wonderful.

I have a great job. I work in a coffee shop called Uncommon Grounds. It’s a comfortable little place right next to the State University at Albany. We do plenty of business, and almost everyone who comes in comes back, most of them every day, some of them multiple times a day. I’m a small part of hundreds of people daily life, and they mine. Many of them keep it simple and comfortable, some like to get into it a little deeper. Sometimes I’m just a bartender with an easy ear, other times I’m a philosopher with the right one-sentence thought to reset somebody’s switches. Sometimes I’m the bright light which illuminates a cozy patch in someone’s otherwise cold and gloomy day. Every now and then, I’m the crazy mother”f”er who’ll eat anything. Other times I’m the quick quip and laugh that is the continuing reminder of how funny life is. Occasionally, I’m the scapegoat someone needs when they feel like destroying something. Sometimes I’m the counselor, sometimes, the fearless leader. Often, I’ve been the shoulder to cry on. Sometimes I’m the boyfriend, when there can’t or won’t be another. Other times, I’m the brother, to one of the guys who doesn’t know where else to turn. Sometimes, I need to be the son, or grandson. Always, I need to be the friend.

To all of them, I’m the constant. When things happen to them, I wait at the Grounds for them to show me what the world has offered them.

I love all my people, and everyone of them are worthy of my life. They do more for me than I for them. They’ve given me a home the likes of which I may never see again.

I hope you understand that I have to go... because of the love and gratitude I have for you... I’ve lost track of who I really am. I’m ready to taste the world, even if it’s bitter.

May 10, 2005

Redefinitions are hard!

My last post was over two weeks ago. Fortunately, Micahs been picking up the slack for me, but, well, that can't go on forever. So we've stumbled across yet another way Tyler will be trying to redefine himself. Its good though, I'm long overdue for a tune-up.

You see, I'm a very "live in the now" guy. Not so much in a carpe diem, or live every day as if its your last sense, I'm just as lazy as the next guy. Well, currently the next guy over would be Craig, and those of you who know him would know that last sentence is a lie. But I'm definately as lazy as the guy after him. My problem, when it comes to being "in the now" is that I have absolutely no clear picture of the future, and its very easy to let the past slip away.

One of the reasons I'm taking this trip is to help inspire a more coherent vision of my future life. My brother is a great planner, and he has vision enough for the both of us right now, and I need to find out what makes him tick. What I do have is blind confidence. Tyler does not fail in his tasks, even though he never has the forsight to prepare for them.

The other trouble I have is that I lose the past quickly. I love the world. Its fantastic, beautiful, inspirational... magical. It moves through me like the wind through the treetops. I relish every moment of it... even when I'm feeling sorry for myself. That in itself is a wonderful thing, except I have to actively force myself to take a moment here and there to record a little of it. I just catch myself resisting it.

That is what this is all about. Micah gave me a new camera, Which will aid in my recording process even though I'm a terrible picture taker.

Oh well... look forward to more frequent, blogs... I'll be back.

May 3, 2005

Slippery When Wet

It's raining in the valley. Which made my 8 mile bike-commute home slippery, a little chilly and blissfully adrenalin fueled. I don't know what it is about exercising in the rain that triggers it but I thrive on the energy that surges through me. I pedal hard, oblivious to discomfort and with a huge grin on my mud streaked face. I don't know why it feels so good. But it does. It makes me feel totally alive.

Being a bicycle commuter means I need to ride in bad weather too. Like the weekend before last when Gary came out to visit. We were forced to ride around on a pleasant spring day. We had to endure sunshine, burgeoning wildflowers, a slight breeze and some great views. Both of these pictures were both taken near the Connecticut river, about a 10 min laidback ride from my home in the bustling center of downtown Northampton.